Home » Uncategorized » 10th Jan 2016 / 1yr 171days – Starting Work, Starting School

10th Jan 2016 / 1yr 171days – Starting Work, Starting School

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  • Itchiness: Moderate
  • Flaking : Very intense, back to craziness
  • Burning skin: nightly 11pm till 4am
  • Redness: Calves, feet, hands, perioral region
  • Soreness : Thighs, palms
  • Weeping skin : Calves, thighs, arms
  • Mood : Back to negativity

As my little family had no income for the past 2 months, and mortgage has yet another few tens of years to go, I was eager to start work on the 14th December. Having left my workplace for 1.5 years, I did expect a lot of new faces. Nevertheless, I was warmly greeted by many colleagues who still recognised me. Mostly were concerned if I was really better, and many were shocked by my weight loss. I was shown to my seat, and am very touched that the girls in my team helped move all my belongings to my new desk, all cleaned and organised. And since they know that my hands are still unable to touch water, they were very willing to help wash my cup and flask for me everyday! :~) I am so thankful!!! IMG_2316 I was happy catching up with all in my department, and sad to realise that my bosses who kindly requested to retain my position while I was absent, are to transfer to a different department in a few days. I wanted to show my gratitude by working hard for them. The irony! Well, I will learn to work well with my new set of bosses. My timing is to start with 4 hours, 3 days a week. Then come January, 8 hours 3 days a week. I will be full time come February. Already, the first day I had to “rest” at the sky garden for 1 hour after only 2 hours in the office.  On the second work day Wednesday, I noticed some red bumps on my perioral region and dismissed it as a reaction to bad food. I suffered at work desk, and scared my neighbour off with the serious flaking and scratching.  I had to moisturise myself every, I dunno, 20minutes? I thought I was just adjusting to the place and so even though I was very miserable, I pulled through with painkillers. It was only Saturday when the fever came and went, that I realised its herpeticum infection yet again! This time as I recognised the signals, I started TCM early to fend the infection. But it went out of control and still spreaded to my eye area. I had to start Acyclovir. IMG_2259 I went to work next week wearing a mask. As the infection was healing, I felt better at work. I had lesser time resting at sky garden. But I didn’t get to carry out my plan to slowly increase my work hours. In pain, but spirits was better than mopping at home. Was happier being at work with colleagues. Although this time, the infection was better managed, I had doubts about TSW all over again. All I know is, there really seem to be no progress. I look at my hands, they look the same 1 year ago. In fact, 1 year ago I was actually better. I could go for photo shoot with my son, I wore tight jeans and I was able to plan and prepare for his birthday. I told myself to be able to cook for his second birthday, but I guess I still can’t.

Cracked wrists 6Jan16

Cracked wrists 6Jan16

Cracked hands 6 Jan 16

Cracked hands 6 Jan 16

Cracked hands 6 Jan 16

Cracked hands 6 Jan 16

Cracked wrists 6 Jan 16

Cracked wrists 6 Jan 16

The more I think about it, the more upset I got. Then I was inconsolable. Perhaps TSW only works for people overseas? Perhaps TSW is not really healing but just being better able to manage the inflammation? I see no real evidence for a serious case in Singapore, and am desperate to find one. My colleagues who are close to me, are quite watchful about what I eat. One colleague went through the trouble of baking gluten-free goods for me!!!! He also bought me some gluten-free snacks and jam! I am touched by their concern, and decided, for their curiosity and the benefit of my TSW warrior readers, to list down the available food options in the workplace I deem ok. Of course, this varies for each individual’s allergy. BEVERAGES:

  1. Honey green tea with pearl (bubble tea shops – tapioca pearls are gluten-free! honey as sweetener instead of sugar. Green tea high antioxidant)
  2. Honey green tea hot (Fun Tea – honey as sweetener instead of sugar. Green tea high antioxidant)
  3. Honey lemon (Coffee & Toast / Kopi Alley – honey as sweetener instead of sugar.)
  4. Buckwheat tea (Iki Soba Raffles Place – buckwheat soba is anti inflammatory)
  5. Rooibos tea (Cedele – high anti-oxidant)

MEALS:

  1. QQ rice various places (brown rice gluten-free, CHOOSE vegetarian items that is NOT MOCK meat, minimal MSG)
  2. Herbal Soup, Tanjong Pagar exchange (Vegetarian options, no msg)
  3. Some traditional soups that stated no MSG
  4. Chee cheong fun / chwee kueh (safe gluten-free, no MSG)
  5. Iki Soba Raffles Place (vegetarian broth options, no MSG, soba anti-inflammatory, gluten-free)
  6. Greendot Vegetarian Raffles Place (gluten-free options, no MSG, safe and DELICIOUS)
  7. Vegetarian sushi (gluten-free)
  8. Korean bibimbap, no egg, sauce aside (gluten-free, vegetarian, kimchi anti-inflammatory)
  9. Korean chapchae (gluten-free, vegetarian options)
  10. Indian plain thosai with dahl curry (heaven option for me, thosai is fermented rice, gluten-free and good for gut, dahl curry has turmeric, anti-inflammatory and is vegetarian)
  11. Cedele (plenty gluten-free options with even turmeric to help infllamation, their soups are absolutely value for money)

I do take meat about twice a week at home, especially when I feel faint with my LBP catching up.   After 3 weeks of part-time work, my son started schooling. I took leave to accompany my son throughout his first 3 days of school. I woke up everyday 6am, did my bath routine, left the house at 730am, and meet him at his school 830am. I am just ever ever ever ever so thankful I get to spend these 3 days with him, that I am well enough to do so, that the parents and teachers at the school were ok with my existence. The memory of these times with my son, is mine and can never be taken away from me. However, I was actually against him starting school. It was never my idea to send my son to school when he is barely 2 years old. Research had shown that a baby’s immune system is yet to be ready until around 4 years. I had wanted him to start school at 3 since a pre-school teacher recommended that is the latest I should start him if I don’t want him to fall behind. My poor baby cried so bad when I tried to leave him on the 2nd day, and even worse on the 3rd day. When he called out to me “come back come back” (in Mandarin, and I was shocked he learnt those words), my heart broke and the image stuck in my brain. Finally, he fell seriously ill on Saturday and the temperature risen and fell, risen and fell for the next 4 days. He couldn’t sleep, awakened by nightmares crying. Then of course, I got angry. Very angry. I was angry that I couldn’t protect him, that I FAILED as a mum. That I knew better but because of family insistence I let him “train courage” and “interact with others”. This is just fever. What if he caught HFMD? I will kill myself. Why in the world of common sense, does one think that a baby who is not even toilet trained, not able to feed himself well, should be taken away from his main caregiver against the law of mother nature? What in the world of common sense, does that ever signal that he is ready for separation anxiety? Even a 6-year-old in school will cry when facing 1st day in school, what more one that is soooooo dependant on a caregiver. I don’t know. I am not criticising parents who send their babies to childcare because they do not have anyone to help take care. They have no choice. But my son had a choice. Yet he is forced to go face inappropriate “training” despite my objections. Ah whatever. Am just glad he recovered, and glad the folks agreed to stop school for him. I need to build his gut health because of the antibiotics damage now. When I am better, I will bring him to those enrichment classes accompanied by parents, like once a week. That’s more sensible. Get him slowly used to interaction with other babies and people. Ok sorry for the very angry rant.  

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3 Comments

  1. Gary Chan says:

    Sue, all the best in your work & endeavours. 风雨无阻.

    Gary

    Liked by 1 person

  2. ahfaye says:

    Wow awesome work dear!! My boy is turning 5 and starting school soon too! I’m more nervous than him lol. Oh dear dont beat yourself up for the small mistakes, seriously it’s like HUGE at the time but really it’s MINUTE. It’s all learning for everyone and we just do better next time. Always believe the universe is working in favour of us. Good u looking into Louise Hay stuff she is good, I’ve started to look at her work too and really we need to start loving ourselves more and more everyday, only this will bring out the goodness in us. I went through similar dietary changes to urs too and now I do high fruits and raw vegan, try this for a few days, your pain and redness may subside as it did for me. You’re doing so well dear keep up the great work *hugs* xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • SueAnne says:

      So happy to hear from you Faye 😀 Raw vegan is “cooling” and I did try for a while, didn’t help me with my LBP but I think I’ll try again, since you are doing well with it. And I keep trying to break through with Louise Hay too… hopefully that day comes soon…..
      You are so strong… thanks for encouragement, means alot coming from you!!!

      Like

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